One of a Million

On Veteran's Day, much like Memorial Day, the 4^th of July, and other patriotic holidays, I'm reminded of how lucky I am. I'm an Army brat, a child of the Vietnam era. I was several months old before I met my father, because he was doing his tour in 1967 when I was born, and as I understand it, returned in early 1968 to the States. I know what it's like to be an officer's kid, living on base, and moving regularly. I don't however, know what it's like to have a parent in a war zone.
As I've gotten older, I've come to see my father for who/what he is, an unhappy & negative person. I accepted long ago that he is who he is, and he's not going to change. He's never been a "dad", who was involved with us, except for a few months after he and my mom separated. Some of that may be a generational thing. Some of it may be the fact that his own father was in the military and gone much of his childhood. I don't know, and ultimately it doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things. When I was very small, I'm told, I didn't like to play games with him because I knew he didn't play fair. His approval means nothing to me, and I long ago stopped trying to get it. I approve of me, and that's what's important. He's missed out on a lot over the years, and it's his loss, because I'm an awesome person, but he'll never get to know that since I refuse to draw him, along with his negativity and drama into my world. I told him long ago that I forgave him for the pain that his actions and attitudes have caused, and I have. I wish him peace and happiness in his remaining years, but in order for me to maintain MY peace and happiness, his will NEVER include me. I see him occasionally, and we've got a sort of peace at those times, as it's much more important to me that whichever nephew or niece is celebrating knows that I love them more than I want to avoid him, but I think he's finally given up and is respecting my request that he not contact me at all.
While I used to wish I had one of those dads who is at all of the games, recitals, or whatever the celebration might be, I know that I am much more blessed than many of my generation, because my father came home from Vietnam, and I had the opportunity to know him, and to form an opinion of him based on personal experience, rather than just stories and photographs.
On this day when we honor those who have served, and those who currently serve, I hope you'll take a moment, as you are thanking them, to thank; offer a prayer, good thoughts, or a hug to their family members, who are left behind for months at a time, never knowing when they'll speak or see their loved one again. Military children are often single parented much of their lives. They deserve an extra hug, any day of the week, because they may have to make the ultimate sacrifice, with no choice in the matter.

Giving Thanks

Another holiday season has officially arrived. Today's attire included this year's first wearing of the festive holiday attire. I left the headwear at home, but the earrings came out, as did the festive holiday socks. I went over for dinner with some fellow MacGiggles and had some fried turkey and tasty sides, plus chocolate cherry cake, a wee slice of pumpkin cake, and a bit of chocolate chip pie. Of course there was a good bit of giggling and some interesting stories told.
By the time I got home, my cats were unhappy, the dog & pig were more than ready to come back into the house, and the upstairs cats were STARVING! I got everybody fed and settled in for the night, and I am POOPED! (Ok, I THOUGHT they were settled, but it sounds as if Bob, Mollie & Blondie are having a conga line or something upstairs!

On my racing trip back to the old house in the hopes that my camera was still over there, I also located one of the 3 iPod cords that I'd torn up my space looking for last night, so I was also able to re-sync the Christmas playlist back onto it, because, well, it's time to listen to and sing Christmas songs! While I am of the firm opinion that Christmas carols should not be played publicly until Thanksgiving, starting on Thanksgiving Day, I'm blasting them as much as possible, and singing along, usually out of key, loving them! Christmas is generally my favorite time of year, I suspect partially because of the amount of joy that seems to be in the air.

Tomorrow's a busy day with finding a storage building, finishing the unpacking of what is already here, and posting the Christmas stash onto Ebay in hopes of clearing more of the stuff that I've been carrying around out. I absolutely want to have my room put together before I head to Galveston for Dickens next week! Since that's the case, I'm thinkin' it's time for me to head for bed, with Too Wong Foo, Thanks For Everything, Julie Newmar as my bedtime viewing/listening!

Counting Blessings

Here lately, there has been much that I've been pretty damned pissy and bitchy about.
I have developed a tendency to see the negatives and dwell on those, instead of being grateful for what I do have. 

1. I have a safe, dry and warm place to lay my head, and that place includes space for my kitties.
2. I have amazing friends who love me and come to my aid when I need assistance.
3. I have a church family that has been loving and supportive for my entire adult life.
4. I have an opportunity to grow and try new things.
5. I am generally in good health

Right now it is a struggle for me to acknowledge and count the blessings in my life, but I am going to try. 

A dear friend sent this story to me in an email. I've seen it before, but it's a good reminder for anyone.

An elderly Cherokee Native American was teaching his grandchildren about life



He said to them,

"A fight is going on inside me, it is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves.

One wolf is evil---he is fear, anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, competition, superiority, and ego.


The other is good ---he is joy, peace, love, hope, sharing, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, friendship, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith. ...



This same fight is going on inside you, and inside every other person, too."


They thought about it for a minute, and then one child asked his grandfather, "Which wolf will win, Grandfather?"

The Elder simply replied, "The one you feed."

I am going to do my best, in this season of giving thanks, and preparing for Christmas, to feed the good one, and not the evil one.