After Christmas

Well, what a week. Christmas has come and gone. On Tuesday I did a little too much, and on Wednesday I paid for it with more pain than I’d had in several days. Since my #2 nephew’s flight home from Alaska got totally screwed up by the storms around Seattle, our family Christmas got moved from Thursday to Friday. I had all day Thursday to just play on the computer and watch tv. Yeah, I needed a day with no times that I was required to be anywhere! It did make for a bit of a lonely day though. I’ve gotten pretty accustomed to spending Christmas out west with my BFF & her kids. While the oldest has been humoring us for several years with the whole Santa thing, but we did get the magic back when the baby came. I did miss, terribly the look on their faces when they see what Santa left. So yesterday I baked cookies and headed to my sister’s house around 1:30 with cookies and chex mix on hand, in addition to the gifts for the kids. It was great to see #2, who, as it turns out, had been delayed YET AGAIN, and had only arrived at 1:15 that afternoon. Now, see, I figure that’s what he gets for moving to Alaska and wanting to live there in the winter… you have to expect delays when it’s that cold outside! My sister cooked a rib roast, and my brother-in-law made the most awesome mashed potatoes using ranch dip mix, in addition to sour cream, bacon bits & chives YUMMMMY. In all honesty, today has been the day I’ve been looking forward to, for a couple of reasons, but mostly because it marked the end of a week that had some of my favorite usual activities unavailable to me, through no control of mine. Yeah, silly me, I kinda thought it might actually end up the way that it should, but alas it didn’t, and I guess I just have to keep being patient. Or else give up completely, and I’m just not quite ready to do that yet, so I’ll keep on with my masochistic ways, I suppose.

5 days later

I’m BAAACK! Nope, I didn’t fall of the end of the world. This is likely to be a long one, so go ahead and take your potty break now, grab your snack, and fix a drink to make yourself comfortable. Last Tuesday I had my surgery, and I gotta tell you, I was scared spitless going in! It was less than freezing when we got up and left my friends’ house at 4FREAKING30 in the morning to head for the surgery center. I checked in and they took me back to pre-op at about 5:45. I was scheduled to be in the OR at 7, but it was almost 7:45 when they came and took me in there, which, of course, had me frustrated beyond belief! This was my 3rd, I think, major surgery. The other 2 occurred when I was 3 & 4, so I have no memory of either of them. I remember crying and telling the nurse that I was about to DIE to go to the bathroom, but when we got there, yeah, nothing happened. I was in a private room with my friends sitting with me around noon-ish, I think. I sort of went back and forth between snoozing, and whining about needing to pee, and random goofy conversation with my friends. Finally about 3:30 I had peed enough to make the nurse happy, and they let me leave. It took 3 of us to get me dressed again, and DAMN it was cold when I got outside, but I was so happy to be able to be on my way home to my cats! I got to talk to the people I most wanted to before I went to bed that night, and my sister came by with some soup. Getting up and down in the night was kind of a trick, as I wasn’t moving all that quickly, and I was on GOOOD drugs! Fortunately, the cats behaved and I didn’t have to fight with them to keep them from tromping across incisions! Wednesday, I decided to move from the bed to the couch in the media room, because I was TIRED of being in a bed! I fixed my little nest, with a big ole glass of water, a bit of dr pepper, my bottle of pain meds, and my laptop. I don’t even remember how many emails I had when I logged in, but I waded through some of them before I took a break and laid down on the couch for a little nap with my Bowbitsy up near my head. One of my friends came by after she’d picked up the kids from school to get a grocery list I’d made. It’s just by chance that she lives about 5 minutes from me, but I was totally astounded when the kids asked if they could stay with me while she went to the grocery store for me. UMM, let me think about this for a second. 1. I had major surgery yesterday, 2. You have spent the entire 5 minutes you’ve been in my house rushing around trying to hunt down my cats despite being told that they are hiding, 3. You have a tendency to do whatever you please despite being asked or told not to do something, and did I mention I just had major surgery? Yeah, I told them that I had just taken another pain pill and needed to lie down so they couldn’t stay. OMG, holy cow, when they came back, they again ran through the house looking for the cats. Sleeping that night was a little easier, and since I had gotten out the wedge pillow, getting up and down in the night was a whole lot easier. Thursday I was moving a little better, and able to go longer between pain pills, but Helen’s car died once she got to work that morning, so that started a whole new drama about what to do. In the end, she found a ride home that night, and to/from Friday as well, with a plan to go look for one to buy on Saturday. Friday morning, I hit 72 hours past surgery, and thus was allowed to start driving. YAY! I had serious cabin fever and wanted the hell out of the house. So I got myself dressed in a shirt, and a pair of pajama capri’s which, on my short little legs, are not capris, but rather a lovely pair of highwaters! My jeans still didn’t fit, and even if they had, I’m thinkin’ the pressure of the button on my incision was really a bad idea, and since I don’t have any sweats anymore, a trip to Wal-Mart was in order. I made it to Hobby Lobby for some ornaments and gift wrap, and then to Wal-mart for some pants that wouldn’t bind or cause problems with my incisions, so I wouldn’t have to run around town in my highwaters or my Dr Pepper pajama pants until I can wear my jeans again. I lasted about 2 hours before my body decided it was time for another pain pill and a nap. I spent a couple of hours sleeping on the couch before I headed out for a few more errands. Once Helen got home, we went over to the mall to pick up a few items. Saturday morning I had to run to check the PO Box, since I hadn’t been there since the previous Saturday, and I needed to mail Darla’s box. Unfortunately, there was a HUGE line, and only 1 person working the counter. Now, WTF is up with that? It’s the Saturday before Christmas, and the PO only has 1 person working? Yeah, well, I knew that I could always go to the airport PO and mail the box today, once I actually had a box to put the stuff in. Lunch was good, and yielded prezzies from Capt, Isa and the cats! I should have brought at least the cats’ stocking in, and given them some of their treats, but that hasn’t happened yet either. I have a fabulous pink piggy moshy pillow! We spent a couple of hours at the car place trying to get Helen into a car, but eventually my body started to protest, and I had to head home, and just trust that Helen would manage. By the time I left for a sorority party that night, I had no idea what was up, but went on the assumption that she either had something, or someone to bring her home. When I got home from the party, which, fortunately, one of my sorority sisters had provided me transportation, so I could take a pain pill before we left the party and I could be ready for bed when I got home, there was a car in the driveway in her spot, so obviously things went well. This morning’s jaunt to church came as a surprise to many folks who thought I would be down for longer than what I have been. I guess that’s the beauty of laproscopic surgery, I’m back to a lot of my regular activities in less than 6 weeks. I took Erin & hers their prezzies after lunch, boxed and mailed Darla’s stuff, and then napped for a little while until I needed to get up and go hang with the youth at church this evening and watch Elf. I’d have to say, that while I do get a bit crabby when it’s time to have another pain pill, I can spend time in traffic without being a total lunatic most of the time, and I don’t feel a constant need to rip someone’s head off! This is a HUGE improvement over my moods over the last several months! Yep, this surgery is one of the best decisions I’ve ever made! A think it’s time for bed.

Frustration Mounts

So, here I am, 5 days until I have the surgery I've wanted for about 5 years now. My doctor told me back in the summer that I could have it, and I purposely scheduled it for as close to Christmas as possible, simply because it's not usually a super-busy time at work, and we are closed for 2.5 days the week of Christmas, and 2.5 days the week of New Years, so I won't have to use too much vacation time. Last week I saw my gynecologist for my pre-op appointment, and to get my paperwork to take to the surgical center for the pre-admission work up. I also called the surgical center, to see if there was a specific time to come in and do the pre-admission and fork over my share of the cost. Nope, just come on in anytime during business hours. So, this afternoon, I left work at 2:30 to go over there. I walked in at 3 (they close at 5), and was told that they only do pre-admission between 8 & 2 p.m. WTF??? The person I talked to last week couldn't have told me that? Yeah, never mind that I have about a thousand things to get done before I leave at the end of the day on Monday afternoon, and I really can't afford the time away from the office! So now I'm going to have to go over there tomorrow, probably during my lunch break. I'll just have to get out of the house a little earlier in the morning and get more done before the phone starts ringing at 7. (well, actually, it sometimes starts ringing before 7, but what the hell, who actually conducts business before 7 a.m.??? Yeah, leave me a message because I'm sure not stopping what I'm in early to do, specifically to have time to get it done before the phone starts ringing to answer your call. I had a raging headache before I even left the office, and the crazies on the road made it worse, and coupled with the fact that apparently my uterus has found out it's being evicted and is going to raise a ruckus as much as possible, so I'm cramping a mere week after my last period ended. Yeah, I'm quite happy to be rid of that particular little bit of BS every month! It seems that I get crabbier and bitchier every day, and at this point, I suspect that, despite the fact that I have wanted this for a very long time, and am looking forward to not having the periods and the drama that goes along with them, I am getting nervous about it. The last time I had major surgery (I'm not counting my Lasik 6 years ago, because, well, I was awake, and I felt no pain), I was 4 years old, and having a plate put in to replace a shattered piece of my skull. Ok, yeah, laugh if you want, I am drain-bamaged, I admit it, because about a teaspoon of brain matter was removed several months earlier when the skull fracture happened. I'm ok with it, I have brain damage and I'm weird, what's your excuse for your weirdness? HMMM?? At any rate, yeah, I'm scared, because I've not been anesthetized in over 35 years. I have every faith in my doctor, and in my support system in general, but y'know, it's still a scary thought.

Hump Day

Well, it's Wednesday again, the middle of the week, and only 7 more days that I'll be able to reproduce, thank heavens! Last night, at a meeting, one of my sorority sisters, who has clearly not been paying attention over the last 3 years when I have said repeatedly "I like children, OTHER PEOPLE'S children, that I can play with and have fun with, then give back when I'm done!" looked at me, in all seriousness, and said "And you are really ok with, you know, not having any children?" I just looked at her, trying not to look too dumbfounded. I mean, not only have I repeatedly said that I don't want children of my own, that I don't have the patience, that the 10 days I spent with newborn Nicholas 2 years ago now was plenty of newborn for me, and just last night I said at least 3 times before she asked the question "by this time next week, I will be uterus-free!!!" Some people just don't listen! Good news that I got today is that The Rogues will be playing North Texas Irish Festival in March. This makes me very happy, especially in light of the fact that they got scratched from the location I was planning to see them in February, since the venue double booked it. I have no idea why the Scottish band is playing the Irish festival, but frankly, who the hell cares, it's live pipes a month earlier than I usually get them, so I'm good with it! My rotten little calico cat is wandering around the house wailing, for no apparent reason, anybody want a cat? I'm working on a list of things I need to get work on this next year, including

• 1. getting my storage room sorted out, so it can be used for its intended purpose: GARB CLOSET. When I moved into this house in the Spring, there were a BUNCH of boxes that I just couldn't sort out immediately, and they got put into the spare room. Sure there is garb in there, but it's not in the closet, its in totes. some of it will remain it totes, but other pieces I think would be better stored hanging.
• 2. I also need to do a little more writing. What I'm going to write, I don't know, but there are several things rolling around in my head, screaming to get out.
• 3. I've also got to get some other stuff organized so that maybe my house will be able to stay reasonably organized and not get to the point that it makes me want to scream in frustration.
• 4. I have sewing to get done before faire: wrap pants for the boys and a couple of shirts for them. I can't guarantee that I'll get the shirts done, they may be more trouble than I'm comfortable with, but the wrap pants should be easy enough, since I have a pair I can use for a pattern.

Friday night should be good, I'm taking my youngest (he's 18 now) nephew and my only niece out shopping for their Christmas gifts. I don't spend nearly enough time with them, and I truly enjoy the 2 of them, and their older brother, who has other plans for that evening already. Which reminds me, I need to check the website of the shopping center and see what all is there now.

Saturday is Drink Like a Pirate Day, and a bunch of us are getting together at TGI Friday's in Ft. Worth to celebrate. It's a great chance to hang with friends and a fabulous excuse to wear garb somewhere besides faire!

Off to bed, hopefully to sleep through the night, and get more than about 5 hours straight!

Friday's adventure.

Ok, yeah, I should have written a little each night, but since I was offline all weekend, it wouldn’t have gotten posted anyway, so here we go. Friday I left for the airport around 2-ish, because I had a couple of stops I needed to make on my way over. First stop was this great little shoe store because Dawn, whose blog I follow, convinced me that I NEED a pair of these THAT DAY. Unfortunately since my EU shoe size is like 37/38, and not 41 or bigger (that’s 10-10.5 US), yeah, I was SOL. I did, however go ahead and buy a pair that are not limited edition or with a really cool print. Second stop was at Chase to make my car payment. Now, my November payment was about 2 weeks late, but my December payment was like 3 weeks early. I had 2 checks written. Each had my loan number on them, and either November or December payment written on them, along with “apply overage to principal”. They were not in the same amount, because I’m paying some extra in an effort to pay it off sooner. So the drive thru teller gets them, and I guess does some weird voodoo ritual with them for 8 minutes or so before the following conversation ensues: Her: “ma’am, are these payments?” Me: “yes, my account number is on there, in the memo section.” Her: “ok, and you want to apply the overage to the principal?” Me: *SIGH* “yes.” Her: “ok, how much is the overage?” (clearly it was too hard for the BANK employee to look in her handydandy computer and see how much my payment is supposed to be, then deduct that from the amount of the check and apply the difference to the principal) Me: “I don’t know, because I haven’t gotten this month’s bill in the mail, and I don’t have last month’s with me.” (Ok, since they are idiots and usually apply at least part of the overage to the NEXT PAYMENT DUE, instead of to the principal, my payment amounts change my several dollars every month) Her: “Well, I’m going to send you out a form to fill out with the amounts and then I can apply it properly.” WTF??? I’ve just told you I DON’T KNOW HOW MUCH IS OVERAGE! UGH! In the end, I estimated , based on what I think was roughly the payment due on the last bill I saw (November’s), how much my payment was and how much was overage for each check. Next stop, Love Field, for my 5:30 flight to Hobby Airport. I get all checked in, like an hour and a half early, in the hopes of getting on an earlier flight as stand-by. Yeah, the upgrade to full fare for the 1 flight cost almost what my round-trip ticket cost when I bought it over a month ago! AND then my flight was delayed. *sigh* We were scheduled to depart at 5:30, and at 5:32 the inbound flight on our plane pulled up to the gate to unload. I think we finally took off right about 6:47. The flight was uneventful, and we made it to Houston, at which point I realized that I’d left my full itinerary at home, so I had to go get in line in order to get a copy of it from an agent. I had to have a copy of it to rent my car. I got to the rental car location, got processed, and by now it’s close to 8, and I was supposed to be in Galveston, at the restaurant for dinner at 7:30. I’m walking out the door with the guy, who says to me “you’ve reserved an economy, what would you like to drive today?” I looked at him and said, “you know, NOTHING has gone right since I left work this afternoon, I should have been in Galveston ½ hour ago, and I don’t much care what I’m driving, so long as I’m driving SOMETHING.” God bless him, he looked at me, and the cars that were available and said “how about a free upgrade to this Nissan Rogue?” Well, now, I may do some crazy things, and I may be weird, but I’m not an idiot, so of course I took him up on the free upgrade. Brand new car, had like 241 miles on it when I hit the road. OMG, if I was in the market for a new car, I would SO look at one! It is spacious inside, more in the passenger area than my Escape is, though you give up a little of the cargo space. It drives beautifully, and virtually no road noise as I was pushing 80 mph to get to Galveston before dinner was done! In the end, I’d had them order for me, and I walked in literally seconds after they put my plate on the table! I was quite definitely ready to be in for the night by the time we got to the house a little after 9! I’ll eventually get photos uploaded and included in the post, but for now, I’ll stop blathering one and actually do a little work.

FINALLY

I’m in a good place, I think, finally. The last few weeks have been dramatic and trying for me, and I’ve been rather a whiny brat, I know. And those of you who have put up with my whiny, ranting, frustrated or just plain down in the dumps texts, bulletins, blogs, and tweets, I love you and thank you for your patience with me. I know I’ve been hard to live with for awhile. Maybe it’s that the 341 Christmas songs on my Ipod have finally penetrated my brain. Maybe it’s that I see the light at the end of the tunnel to being uterus free. 11 days for those of you who are counting. Maybe it’s that I’ve come to a better understanding with someone who has frankly confounded me for the last couple of months. Maybe it’s a combination of those things. I don’t know, and frankly, I don’t really care, I’m just glad that the happy pills are kicking in and I’m not so crabby all the time anymore. In about an hour, I’m leaving the office to run by the bank before I head to the airport for my weekend in Galveston. Last year, the first time I went to Dickens on the Strand, I loved it. There were several shops that I didn’t make it into, and I’m hoping that they are not among the ones that have elected not to return after Ike. I had a grand plan to get together a whole Victorian outfit for this weekend, but alas, life intervened, and I didn’t get it done. Perhaps next year I will be healthier, and thus feel better and be better able to get my shit together. Yeah, don’t hold your breath for that, I’ve been saying it for years. I’ve done a lot of traveling this fall, and I can honestly say that this is only the 2nd trip that I’ve truly been looking forward to. Sure, I was looking forward to the others, but most of them, by the time they came around, I was not as enthusiastic as I had been, and would almost (and in a couple of cases definitely) rather have stayed home. That is not to say that any of my trips were a waste, they were all a learning experience of one sort or another, and they afforded me the opportunity to spend time with people that I enjoy, and only get to see once or twice a year. This is my last trip for the year, and quite frankly, I think it’s high time I stopped for awhile. Among all the faires and festivals I’ve been to, I’ve been at faire/fest a total of 16 weekends, traveling for other Celtic events 2 or 3 weekends, family related travel 2 weekends, plus I moved in March and early April, I don’t think I’ve been that busy in YEARS! I’m TIRED, and am going to take advantage of the time off after surgery to try to finish getting my house in order, and do some real relaxing. Back to the Christmas music… I LOVE Christmas music, and this year, one of my purchases was the Tartan Terrors’ Christmas album. Carol of the Bells has always been one of my favorites, and as much as I love the bagpipes, I never thought about having a version of that tune done on bagpipes. Yep, I love it. What’s not to love, it’s bagpipes, right? J I should create links in this post, but you know what? Right now I’m not gonna, because I’ve got a couple of other things to do before I leave, but I’ll probably get back into it and create them later. Have a great weekend, I know I will!

OK, so my pity party isn’t over. I can only hope that once the next couple of weeks are done, some of this craziness in my head & body will go away, once my surgery is done. Sigh. I HATE people who whine and moan all the time about how awful their life is, yet I seem to be becoming one of those people. I seem to have become very negative here lately, and I suspect it’s causing me to push people away, that I really don’t want to push away. Maybe I’m not even pushing, maybe they are just deciding that it’s better to avoid me, I don’t really know. I’m not sure how to ask either. This weekend I have plans to go to Galveston for Dickens on the Strand, and I’ll put on my happy face and get through that, hopefully without too many questions that are going to send me back into this dark place I seem to have found myself in. I’ll be spending time with people who bring great fun and joy into my world, and hopefully that will help. If not, well, at least I’ve done my part to help with the recovery from Ike, right? Off to bed, as my meds are kicking in.